Saturday, October 20, 2012

Swirling, whirling thoughts and prayer request

So many thoughts are bumping around in my head.  I haven't written in a while and my mind and spirit can tell.  It is a sort of catharsis, or therapy even, to just punch out on the keyboard what my mind can sometimes not even categorize to file away. 
So many things have changed in what feels almost like a whirlwind that I have no control or power over.  I have a job.  After 7 years at home I am now, once again, part of the working world.  And WHEW  had I forgotten what that world was like.
These last 7 years I have changed so much.  I have confronted my abuse and found a way to deal and cope.  I have removed temptations from my life in the safe environment of my own little nest, and found great relationship with and comfort from my Lord and Savior.  But I had no idea how sheltered from the World I truly was. God gave me a gift that I wasn't even aware of til not.  Not only was my home a nursery for my growing and developing children; it was also a nursery for mu growing and developing faith. It has been a definite culture shock to re-enter a society that does not know the God that I know as intimately as I do.  It is truly surreal.  But that is a post for another day.
On top of the culture shock, I am struggling with seeing my sweet baby girls less and less.  That is really hard on both me, and them, and Jason.  He is having to step up even more than he ever has before.  He has to get both girls dressed and fed without me.  He has been cooking dinner every night, bathing both girls and so many other little things that I cannot even keep up with.  Like I said, thinks have just changed.
I could go on and on but here is the real reason I need journal therapy today.  My body is under spiritual attack.  Call me a religious fanatic, call me crazy, call me whatever but I believe what I believe, and alot of it the world labels as nutty.  I always think of the song by Scott Krippayne:
"Some people tell me that i look kind of funny
my nose is red and the braces don't work at all
they say the clothes i wear are all out of fashion
i don't fit in and should be shopping at a different mall
i studied classical piano
when i could've been playing guitar
i used to drive an el camino
and i'm not even sure it's car

i'm no cool but that's okay
my god loves me anyway
i'm not cool but that's alright
i'm still precious in his sight
i'm not cool but i don't care
how i'm supposed to do my hair
i'm not cool but that's okay
my god loves me anyway

it doesn't matter if i know all the lingo
he doesn't mind if i'm not hanging with a certain crowd
some people still believe in building an image
but i am finding that's a worry i can do without
i used to wish i was athletic
but football was never my game
i made some friends in mathematics
but no one can spell my last name


he says that i am a one of a kind
and i don't have to try to be somebody else
he believes in me and says i'm free to be myself
i can be myself"

I may not be cool, but I KNOW that I KNOW that I KNOW that true evil exists and is around us every day.  I know that our battles as Christians are not with the flesh but with principalities--spirits.  I have been at war spiritually with alot of evil creeping around the corners of my new job.  The kids have been brainwashed with lies that they will fail, they they should not try, with promiscuity, drugs, stealing, lie, lies, lies....oh so many lies.  There is an extremely malevolent spirit of gossip with a very powerful stronghold on the staff at my job.  In addition to the gossip, I feel the presence of an unhealthy spirit of comparison and competition.  It is heavy and palpable.  I pray against it every morning.  God has asked me to fight on behalf of the stand in the gap and fight for them.
I am so very tired.  I have called out these things and spoken the power of the blood of Christ over them and I am being attacked.  I have had to go to bed every night this week by 7.  I wake exhausted.  My arthritis is flaring.  I have extreme swelling that I cannot get to go away.  My twisted vertebrae and bulging discs in my neck are killing me. I have pitting in my nails again from my psoriasis (they had been in remission) and now for the first time in 17 years I have a psoriasis plaque somewhere other than just in my scalp.  I have a big, painful lesion on the back of my neck.  I need prayer for protection, for healing, and for perseverance.
I want the love of Jesus to be seen through me. I want to be his vessel.  But this body is an old broken clay pot.
Please support me in prayer.

Friday, August 10, 2012

A man with a bag....a challenge to apathy

As I was driving to robotics training out at TSTC today, I witnessed something truly amazing and rare.  At the intersection of Steinbeck Bend and Lake Shore drive, in the middle of a grassy island separating the intersections, there was a gentle old man.  His body was worn; his back slumped, and his gait arthritic--but he boldly wore a smile as he gingerly carried his plastic bag.  At first I was concerned.  What was he doing?  Why was he in the grass at the middle of this intersection and why was he carrying a bag?  And then I witnessed what America used to be about...that thing that made us all want to stand and salute our flag as one nation UNDER GOD....that thing that brought us all together after 911....that thing that somehow, somewhere along the way, the younger generations and even the nation as a whole lost sight of.  What am I talking about?  I am talking about an elderly man in the middle of a Central Texas intersection in the midst of the deadly Texas heat carrying a garbage bag, wearing a smile and picking up TRASH.  Yeah that's right!
He saw a mess.  He saw a mess in the middle of a city that he took pride in and he didn't simply roll his eyes and drive by.  He didn't sigh and make some sarcastic comment about kids these days.  He DID SOMETHING.  He struggled to not stumble, I could see the wear on his body with each step, but there he was...smiling and all the while methodically picking up trash tossed out of the windows of passing cars without even the slightest hesitation or second thought.
I sat there at this red light and watched as he bent and picked up piece after piece of trash.  No one asked him to do that.  He wasn't earning a paycheck.  He wasn't serving some kind of community service.  He did it because it needed to be done.  Car after car passes that intersection day after day and they all either didn't notice or just expected the people who are paid to do that to show up and clean.
As the light turned green, I rolled down my window and yelled "Thank You!".  He gave a quick glance my way and a friendly wave of the hand and continued about his task.
I was moved.
I thought of him all day.
What could I do?  How could I pass along the joy of this sight.
I pray this post did just that.  I pray that you pause a moment and consider this single lil old man who decided to DO SOMETHING.

Saturday, July 14, 2012

The Sub Tub: Be prepared for a substitute teacher

As part of my MCC certification course I was assigned the task of making an organized resource for a substitute.  I am a pinterest junkie and I had seen the idea of a sub tub.  This is a hanging file folder tub with assignment choices, seating charts, procedures, pictures of where work should be turned in for each class and important locations of supplies etc, classroom rules, a map of the school, important phone numbers and even student pictures (if you feel really creative).
I know that I will have 2 classes this year, 7th grade life science and 8th grade earth science so I needed resources for both preps. 
So this is how I went about conquering this task...
I began by choosing activities that any sub could handle with little or no science experience--22 for each subject.  Yeah, I know that is allot but there is a method to my madness.  Every activity in my tub should take about 30 min of class time.  Since kids are a bit rambunctious anytime there is a sub, I figured 30 min should be a realistic amount of time for them to spend on a structured activity.  For both Earth and Life sciences, there are about 11 brainteaser activities that have nothing to do with science.  There are also about 11 content-related activities.  I did this because I have no way of knowing what we will be studying anytime that I am absent. 
The Tub is organized by folders ordered 1-22.  In my filing system L stands for life science and E stands for Earth science.  So my tabs read L1, E1, L2, E2 and so on.
I use the CHAMPS behavior method in my classroom to clearly state student expectations.
C-conversation voice level 0-4
H- help, how to get it
A- activity
M-movement, how you can move around the room
P-participation, how to show it
Inside all 44 folders there is the activity for that folder plus a substitute information sheet.  The sub info sheet includes a warm-up activity for students when they enter the room and the CHAMPS for that activity, how many days that activity should last plus what students should do once they finish the activity.

In addition to my sub tub I have a folder that I keep with me at home called my sub tub key.  This key has information about what activities are in each folder.  For instance I can simply crack open my key and see if there is an activity in-line with what we studied the day before and of not, then I can choose a brainteaser.  I then simply tell the sub to use folder E13 and L15.  All the work is already done and in my classroom.  The sub simply has to make copies and follow the info in the folder.  It only took me one evening to put this all together.  Not too difficult as long as you know ahead of time how you want to organize it.  I still need to get the pics of kids and important places around my classroom together--haven't had access to my room yet.  I think this will be a great asset for this upcoming year!  Thank you PINTEREST!

How to prepare for the Composite Science 8-12 TEXES certification exam

My goodness!  It has been a while since I have written.  It has been a wild few months with some great achievements, a new job, cool training, lots of studying and some awesome experiences.  What I feel to be one of my greatest accomplishments is passing the composite science TEXES exam.  So, I thought I would take the time to blog about how I prepared for it.
I know that when I was getting ready to take the test, I was a bit discouraged with the lack of reliable resources about how I should prepare.
Let me begin with a bit of background.  Everyone will approach this test from difference backgrounds, experience etc.  If you are right out of college with a good understanding of Chemistry and Physics as well as basic Biology concepts you may be able to barely pass the exam--but pass none-the-less.  However, if you are like me--several years removed from any sort of formal education, you are going to have to work for it.  I graduated Baylor in 2003 with a BA in Biology.  I had 17+ course hours of bio, about 12 hours of chemistry and 12 hours of physics.  I had no college training in geology or astronomy. 
After graduation I taught 3 years at a private christian school and taught myself the basics of earth science.  During my 3rd year of teaching, I became pregnant and then spent the next 6 years at home raising my sweet babies.
My girls are now 6 and 4 and it is time for this season of my life to change.  I began looking into returning to the classroom and I knew that this time around I wanted to teach in the public school system. In order to do this you have to be 'highly qualified" in your field of science--basically this means that you have to have 15 or more college hours in any field you desire to teach.  If you have that, you do not have to take the TEXES exam for that content area and you can simply be certified.  While I am considered 'highly qualified' in biology I was not in Physics, Chemistry, Astronomy or Geology so I was required to take the exam.
I began by taking a practice exam at my Alt Teacher Certification program office.  I BOMBED it. I think I scored like a high 50.  The exam is broken down into competencies so from here I knew what I needed to work on.  Chem and Physics were weak--I literally remember thinking to myself "Who is 'Avocado' and why is his number important?", LOL!!!!  It truly had been 6 years since I had thought about ANYTHING chemistry related.
I began my journey at the local library.  Get this--there is this building in your city with thousands and thousands of books.  All you have to do is get a card, pick some books and they let you take them home with you for a while FOR FREE!  Ok. I know this sounds ridiculous--you know what a library is, right!? But the truth of the matter is this--we are so accustomed to thinking about items in a capitalistic society being for sale that my first thought was, "How am I going to afford all the books that I need to study on a single income budget?".  I forgot about libraries.  I forgot about that resource and my first instinct was to buy them...WRONG!!!!
So I went to my library's website and I found high-school level text books in Chemistry, Physics, Earth Science and Astronomy.  I reserved them and the hubs picked em up for me.  I began by reading these books cover to cover.  I worked all the examples out on scratch paper and made my own formula sheets to study.  I am an active reader and I think this method is a very good one to follow in order to prepare for this test.  TAKE NOTES!  It is a proven fact that you remember more of what you wrote down....I made sure to note all major concepts and methods in my own words as I was reading the texts.  Please, DO NOT simply read without taking notes--you WILL NOT retain all of the material and then when you need to refresh on something you can skim through 20 pgs of notes vs hundreds of pages of text.
After 20+ hours of study time I retook a different practice exam, the one posted online in the TEXES booklet.  I STILL bombed it!  My score was now in the high 60s but you MUST score 80 or above to pass the actual exam.
I began to freak out!  I have always been a strong student.  I thought I had prepared well, and I was still not doing so good.  What now?
Well, I decided to try out a favorite teaching mantra--work smarter not harder.  Youtube and wikipedia became my new best friends.  I went thought the TEXES preparation manual line by line and looked at the TEKS.  If I came across a concept I didn't have a firm grasp on I looked it up.  This worked well for a while.  If I found a problem I couldn't work, I posted it on facebook and asked for help.  My friends were great! A week later (mind you, i studies every evening for a week for 3-4 hours a day) and I returned to MCC (my teacher certification program school) and retook the first practice exam.  I was now in the low to mid 70s.  This is when I found the resource of all resources! Brightstorm2 on youtube.  They changed my whole studying plan.
They have amazing online resources that are simply like a HS class.  There are categories for Physics, Chemistry and Biology.  I quickly changed course.  I watched EVERY video in each of these categories and actively took notes while watching them.  The guy who does the physics videos is really fun to watch!!!
Having taken 3 practice exams I had a firm grasp on what I needed to know:
phases of the moon and its effect on tides
classifications of rocks
rock cycle
interpreting sedimentation
types of genetic selection
water cycle
types of clouds
weather patterns and formation
atomic structure
how the periodic table is organized
electron shells
limiting reactions
Mohs hardness
nitrogen cycle
acids and bases
sex-linked inheritance
gas laws plus their formulas name just a few.
And I did it!  I passed my next practice exam with an 86.  I was ready.

If I could sum this test up into one sentence it would be this:Although there is nothing terribly difficulty on the exam, the sheer breadth of knowledge and content that the exam covers makes it very difficult to know everything that you need to know.  It is simply beginner level chem and physics but you also have to know something about every other doctrine of science as well, and you have no clue as to what area of each doctrine you will be asked about, so you simply have to know it all...
With that said, I found that the score on the practice test was a good indicator for actual test performance.  Although I left the testing center feeling unsure about my score (I always second guess myself) I scored the exact same score as I did on my last practice test--an 86!
Phew--just thinking about that time spent preparing, relearning and studying makes me drool and then my eye starts twitching....but I am so thankful that it is behind me. 

For those of you with this test looming in your near future, I hope that this helped you in some way.  This is not a test you simply walk-in and ace.  Not saying that it isn't possible for someone to do that, just that it isn't likely.  I have a new-found respect for all HS science teachers!!!
I am exhausted from just writing about this test!
Hope this helps and GOOD LUCK!  Feel free to comment with questions!

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Help Paint Waco Blue 2013

This year's Paint Waco Blue Campaign has been a real learning experience and a successful fundraising campaign for our local Family Abuse Center.  To expand the campaign next year I am looking for donors/sponsors who would be willing to purchase pinwheels for one, of not multiple PinWheel gardens next year.
According to the official Pinwheels for Prevention site:
Join us in preventing the abuse and neglect of our nation's children by participating in Pinwheels for Prevention™, Prevent Child Abuse America's campaign introducing the pinwheel as the new symbol for child abuse and neglect prevention nationwide.

The pinwheel represents Prevent Child Abuse America's efforts to change the way our nation thinks about prevention, focusing on community activities and public policies that prioritize prevention right from the start to make sure child abuse and neglect never occur.

Nearly 900,000 pinwheels have been displayed since April 2008. Join us by bringing Pinwheels for Prevention to your community!
This program is something that I would be very excited to add to our campaign next year. 
In addition Paint Waco Blue will be participating in the National House Party Weekend in October.  This is a national fundraising program in which the host opens up their home or venue for an event of their choosing.  I am planning a Dinner and Games with friends event either at my home or the Erath building.  The way funds are raised is that participants are asked to either pay a set cover charge or make a donation to the cause.  I have set a $500 goal for Paint Waco Blue.

Keep brainstorming with me and we can make the 2013 Paint Waco Blue one for the history books!!!

If you have any questions or ideas please feel free to email me at

If you are interested in purchasing pinwheels for next years campaign please visit:

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Tim and the Keith Family: What happened and how to help

Many of you have seen information posted on social media sites about lil Tim Keith but the information is choppy and in different locations.  I have decided to compile it all here so people can learn about what happened and then how they can help this sweet family.
Joey, Eva and Tim were an integral part of The Church at Tree Lake deaf ministry and family up until just a few months ago when they moved to Washington D.C.  They were sorely missed.  Just this month the family was met with tragedy.  5 year old Tim was struck by a taxi in New York City as the family was enjoying a vacation.  Here is an article that appeared in the New York Daily News:
"A deaf 5-year-old boy was fighting for his life after he was mowed down by a cab in Brooklyn — as his horrified parents, who also can’t hear, looked on.
Timothy Keith’s mother and father were inconsolable after their first family trip to the city turned to heartbreak Saturday. With tears streaming down her face, Timothy’s mother described what happened in a wrenching written interview.
“I was with my son. The(n) he walk to road. I say NO to him,” wrote Eva Keith, 29, of Washington, D.C.
“I saw taxi yellow so fast. Driver hit my son but my son can’t hear.”
The Keith's and a friend had just left their hotel, a Comfort Inn, and were heading to see the Brooklyn Bridge when tragedy struck.
Timothy broke away from his parents and sprinted between parked cars onto Hicks St. in Cobble Hill when a yellow SUV cab hit him about 5 p.m., cops said.
The driver, who stayed at the scene, told cops he couldn’t stop in time. He wasn’t charged.
Timothy, who suffered brain damage, was treated at Long Island College Hospital and later transferred to University Hospital of Brooklyn-SUNY Downstate Medical Center.
The parents’ friend, Brian Walters, 24, who also is deaf, wrote that he wasn’t sure the boy would make it.
Timothy’s dad, Joseph, 29, had to cut short a written interview because he became too emotional.
“Unexpected,” he wrote."

Tim passed away April 17 from his injuries.  The family is returning to Texas from New York to lay Tim to rest in Tyler--the city of his birth.
The Church at Tree Lake has set up a paypal account to accept donations to help this family with mounting expenses.
Payments can be made in the following ways:

• Cash Donations
• Personal Checks
           o Written to Church at Tree Lake
           o Write “Keith Family” in the memo line
• Online Donation via PayPal

Online Payment Directions:
• Go to
• Open a PayPal account if you have not done so already. The account can be linked to your bank account or a credit card
• Once your account is created select the “send money” tab
• In the email box type
• Type in your donation amount
• Select Personal
• Select Gift
• Select continue
• Scroll down to the email to receipt
• In the subject box type “Keith Family”
• Please fill free to include a brief message with you name as well
If you already have a paypal account you can use the button at the bottom of this page to make your donation.

In addition to the account set up by The Church at Tree Lake there is another account out of the Washington D.C. area.  The website for this fund is HERE.  This fund is $1230 shy of reaching a $5,000 goal. Both funds benefit Eva and Joseph directly during this time or great sorrow as the medical and burial expenses continue to mount.

In addition to the paypal and check/cash donations a memorial button has been created at in honor of the life of Tim Keith.  Click here to view and purchase this button.  The zazzle commission earnings of 34% will then be donated by me back to the fund set up by The Church at Tree Lake.

Funeral arrangements are as follows:
Flowers may be sent for little Tim to Harmon Undertaking Co. at 1112 Palace Ave., Tyler, TX 75702.

Visitation will be there Monday April 23 6-10 pm and Tuesday 8 am-3 pm.
Graveside services will be Tuesday April 24 at 3:30 pm at the Tyler Memorial Cemetery at 12053 State HWY 64, West Tyler, TX 75704.
If you are not able to help this family financially then please please pray.  Joey and Eva will need our support even more so in the upcoming weeks and months.  No parent should ever have to bury their child, and I cannot even begin to fathom the pain these parents are enduring.  Please lift them, and the driver of the taxi, up every chance you get.

Timothy Keith 02/03/07 12:02am TO 04/17/12 5:35pm

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Soft Launch: Paint Waco Blue/April is Child Abuse Awareness month

Add this ribbon as you
social media profile pic for
the month of April.
As many of you know, I am a child abuse survivor. This year I have felt led to organize a grassroots awareness campaign for the Waco area.  Most people have heard about Breast Cancer Awareness Month and eagerly wear pink in support of survivors, but very few people know that April is Child Abuse Awareness month (and interestingly enough ALSO my birthday month!).  Would you be willing to wear blue this April?
I am calling my efforts:  Paint Waco Blue.  Since this will be it's first year in existence, we are starting small with the sole goal of increasing awareness of the silent epidemic of child abuse in Waco and the surrounding areas.  The campaign will consist of various 'blue' items for purchase, a blue hair extension a new limited edition eye shadow event at The Dollhouse in Hewitt, a discounted photo shoot from Heartisitc Photography if you wear blue, and an informative presentation by the Advocacy Center for Crime Victims and Children at the Erath building in China Spring, Texas as well as promotion of various Child Abuse Awareness interviews from
The items available for purchase include 'Dollface' baby blue limited edition eyeshadow by Kendall Shilling, Blue Hair extensions, and 3 different locally-made embroidered tee shirts by Nifty Treasures.  All of the tee shirts will be baby blue with dark blue embroidery.  The first tee shirt design says "I Am A Child Abuse Survivor" on the front and the back reads "April is Child Abuse Awareness Month".  The second tee shirt design reads "I Know A Child Abuse Survivor" and the back reads "April is Child Abuse Awareness Month".  Lastly, the third tee shirt design says on the front "Paint Waco Blue" and the back reads "April is Child Abuse Awareness Month".  Each vendor selling items is donating a portion of their earnings back to me to purchase copies of my abuse/trauma children's book, "Why Did This Happen to Me, Aunt Lou" for the Waco Family Abuse Center.
The Photography discount from Heartistic Photography is good for an outdoor shoot during the month of April.  Any client who agrees to wear blue for their shoot receives $25 off their session, making the shoot a very resonable price of $100.  You can contact Amy Jo via the facebook page linked to in this article to set up your appointment.
The Dollface eyeshadow costs $15 and 10% goes back to purchase books.
The hair extensions are $10.
All tee shirts cost $20 and $5 goes back per shirt to purchase books.
All items are being presold--if you are interested in purchasing any items please contact me at before April 20.  The BIG EVENT takes place all day April 20 at the Dollhouse at 123 Topeka in Hewitt Texas.  Kendall shilling, owner of the salon, will be installing all ordered extensions and filling previously placed orders for the blue eyeshadow.  Tee shirts will be ready for pick-up at the salon event as well. There will also be BLUE cupcakes and other fun refreshments.  Our goal is to blanket Waco and the surrounding areas with as much blue as possible to get people asking "WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH ALL THE BLUE?!?!".  One of the first and most important steps against fighting child abuse is communication.  If people start talking about child abuse, it could possibly give a child the opportunity to reach out for help.
The final event for Paint Waco Blue will take place April 27 at the Erath Building in China Spring Texas.  STREAMS, a stay at home mom's Bible study group, will be hosting an informational meeting open to the public presented by The Advocacy Center for Crime Victims and Children about child abuse, the warning signs and the rights of parents.  The event will take place during the normal STREAMS meeting time which begins at 10am.  The meeting should last about an hour and a half, childcare is available (a small donation will be gathered for our childcare provider) and a light lunch will be provided afterwards.
It is a small start but a start none-the-less. If you would like to coordinate with us on any event, have an event idea, or provide an item for sale please don't hesitate to contact me! Help me bring awareness to this uncomfortable but important issue!

To purchase items via paypal click HERE.

Links to interviews:
Interview with Judy Powers
Interview with Sierra Sullivan
Interview with Star
Interview with Velvet Martin
Interview with Elizabeth Brawley
Interview with Julie Federico
Interview with Anita Wladichuck

Monday, March 5, 2012

Marshall Speaking Engagement

Today I visited with the entire fourth grade class of South Marshall Elementary school.  I made the connection via an old mascoting sponsor and my sister’s coach’s wife—Amy Purifoy.  It was a great day.  I was asked to motivate the students to write.  I really struggled with my angle for weeks, but when Jason and I took our 10th anniversary getaway God granted me a great topic:  Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me…=FALSE!!!!

Upon arriving and setting up this morning, Mrs. Purifoy introduced me to the kids and I started things off right—I immediately gave the children sugar.  Mind you, my presentation was at 8:30—first thing Monday morning.  So after passing around the bucket of gum, and trashcan for their papers I asked the kids to write down 5 words to describe their gum to someone who had never chewed gum, didn’t know what it was and had never even heard of it.  They did great.  I got some really good vocabulary from them—words like tart, smooth, extraordinary and many more unexpected jewels.  After this exercise I transitioned into introducing my main topic on how words are powerful.

 I quoted the ole sticks and stones saying to them, and told them that I was there to show them that this was a lie—that words can do a lot of things and harm is indeed one of their powers. 

I asked for 9 good sports willing to be volunteers.  The kids were eager to help.  I chose nine and they lined up along the front of the room for me.  I had prepared a bag full of candy with endearing and offensive names.  I shook each child’s hand, asked their name and said it was nice to meet them then I said you know what I think you are?  They each looked at me with both a bit of fear and excitement in their eyes--they knew something was coming…

I told the first child, “I think you are a NERD” and I handed the child a box of nerds.  The next child I repeated the same banter and gave them cry babies.  This continued with candies such as runts, air heads, goobers and dum dums. The kids went bezerk! They enjoyed it just about as much as I did.  But I had 3 more to go.  I had smarties, sugar babies and a BIG HUNK!  You should have heard them howl when I handed their classmate his candy and told him that he was a big hunk.  It was adorable.

After passing out all of the candy, I pointed out to the kids the effect my use of simple words had upon them and their classmates.  They laughed, they giggled, they howled and THEY LOVED IT!  I asked them to help me make a list of things that words can do.  They listed words like teach, help, make smile, make laugh, hurt, harm, make angry and encourage.

From there I moved into telling them a bit more about myself and my writing experience.  I told them that I was an abuse survivor, and as an adult I went through several years of hard times and healing.  I told them that as I was healing I wrote some things down and over time those things turned into a story.  I told them about how my story was very private and personal and how it was hard for me to share it with others but I realized that maybe, just maybe what I knew could help someone else.  I told them my testimony about how my books came to be illustrated and finally published and how what began as one single book had morphed into a series of books.

I then told them that we all have a story and that their story could be happy, or sad, or funny, or scary, or it could teach something or just simply make someone smile.  But somewhere inside each of us there is something that we can give--something that we can pull out of our hearts, lay down on paper and give to someone else.  While this is a very vulnerable act it is also a very rewarding act.  You are in a way letting a part of yourself exist outside of your body so that someone else can read it and allow it to become a part of them in a way that nothing else can—not TV, not Video games.  Books make you create the images.  Books make you see the colors.  They make you think.

I told these kids to relax and take it easy.  I told them to know themselves and just be themselves.  Writing shouldn’t be something rigid or difficult.  I told them to have fun with it and give themselves over to it fully.  While the correct order and just the right structure in the sentences is all well and good, the heart and soul of writing isn’t in the logistics—it is in the authors comfort with the pen.  I told them that to score a 4 (the highest writing score on the test that they were preparing for) they didn’t just have to remember all the rules but they also had to open their hearts and give something of themselves to whatever topic they were to write about.

I then told them that to be a successful writer they didn’t have to make a lot of money, or win an award, or sell thousands of copies.  I told them that success in writing comes from their desire and ability to use the power of their words in a manner to communicate something good, something worthwhile and something helpful--that in helping just one person they then become successful writers.

To close I told them that I realized that as 4th graders they may sometimes feel powerless like nothing is in their control.  They can’t vote.  They can’t drive.  They can’t earn a paycheck and even sometimes they aren’t even listened to.  But I encouraged them that regardless of all of these things that they indeed do have power—they have words.  Their words have influence and their words can change things.  I told them to look inside, find their story, write it down draw it up and take a chance to make a difference and to be heard.  I told them to be themselves, just be themselves on paper.

It ROCKED!  The kids were respectful and fun.  The school is getting each student a book writing kit and they are each going to write their own story.  The teachers are then going to send them to me to pick one from each class to submit to my publisher.  The kids were STOKED about that. 

When all the pleasantries were done and the kids were heading out the door I kid you not—I HAD TO SIGN LIKE 88 JOURNALS!!!!  Each kid had their journal with them to write and they each wanted me to sign it.  It was fun!

Hope I get to do it again soon!

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Airrosti...there are no words (OK there are a few)

Today was my release  appointment from Dr. Hill, my airrosti provider.  I cannot effectively put into words the relieff I feel from having gone through this treatment program.  I have spent YEARS (you can read the prior blog post entitled Day 7: End of fast and Airrosti for the background on that) suffering in pain and only finding doctors who wanted to either medicate me, electrocute me, or stick a huge needle into my spinal column.  I had five 1-hour Airrosti sessions and I now know the cause of my pain, how to retrain my body to stop creating the pain, and where to go if the pain returns--no narcotics necessary.
Upon first visiting Dr. Hill I was amazed at the force he had to use to straighten out my fascia and relax my muscles.  It was intense!!!  I used to poke fun at my husband because he REFUSED to rub my neck, sometimes even if I were in tears, because he said it hurt his hands.  I just thought he was being a big baby.  But then I got to truly experience what it took to do the job right.  I am not sure how Airrosti providers do it all day, but they do.  Dr. Hill even showed me a callous on his thumb after me telling him the story about Jason.  Is there Airrosti for Airrosti provider's hands?  Seriously...I couldn't do it all day.
But back to the story.  The issue is resolved.  I know my exercises and will continue to do them.  I have a follow up in a month to check my progress and I can return for 'touch up' visits if the pain breaks back through.  Basically, I am a teeth clincher and I carry my stress in my shoulders.  The worst damage was on the side of my neck that draws up when I carry my kids on that hip (left side), and it was so very bad just because it went so long untreated--or poorly treated I should say.
During the exercise portion of the visits the lady had been using what they call "The Stick" to help loosen up the tender areas the doctor worked on that day.  I decided to aide Jason's poor lil hands and purchased the stick upon my release today.  It was a whopping $40--money well spent if you ask me.  Consider this...In the years that I have been searching for answers to my neck I have
seen the GP 4 times: $100 copay
seen a neurosurgeon twice: $80 copay
had 2 MRIs: for combined cost of $342 coinsurance after twice meeting a $500 deductible
took 3 years worth of muscle relaxers
and had 1 spinal cortisone injection $145 coinsurance
used 3 years worth of muscle rub
and spent nights in agony....
That is a monetary out of pocket total of $667!!  That is NOT the amount billed to insurance--just the amount that we had to pay after insurance.
In total for Airrosti I had 5 visits at $10 per visit plus my whopping $40 purchase of "The Stick".  When all is said and done I am pain free and have a management plan for a low price of only $90!  $90!!!

I am one very happy customer and I will SING Airrosti's praises to anyone who will listen!  Even if Jason's insurance didn't have the special $10 copay set up I would have only been out of pocket $240 at the $40 specialty copay.  Comeon people--Just do it! And I don't mean Nike...I mean AIRROSTI!!

Reposted from email: Father of Columbine Victim and his speech to Congress

Columbine student's father 12 years later

Definitely worth the read!

Guess our national leaders didn't expect this. On Thursday, Darrell Scott, the father of Rachel Scott, a victim of the Columbine High School shootings in Littleton, Colorado, was invited to address the House Judiciary Committee's subcommittee. What he said to our national leaders during this special session of Congress was painfully truthful.

They were ill-prepared for what he was about to say, nor was it received well. It needs to be heard by every parent, teacher, politician, sociologist, psychologist, and so-called expert! These courageous words spoken by Darrell Scott are powerful, penetrating, and deeply personal. There is no doubt that God sent this man as a voice crying in the wilderness. The following is a portion of the transcript:

"Since the dawn of creation, there has been both good and evil in the hearts of men and women. We all contain the seeds of kindness or the seeds of violence. The death of my wonderful daughter, Rachel Joy Scott, and the deaths of that heroic teacher, and the other eleven children who died must not be in vain. Their blood cries out for answers.

The first recorded act of violence was when Cain slew his brother Abel out in the field. The villain was not the club he used. Neither was it the NCA, the National Club Association. The true killer was Cain, and the reason for the murder could only be found in Cain's heart.

In the days that followed the Columbine tragedy, I was amazed at how quickly fingers began to be pointed at groups such as the NRA. I am not a member of the NRA. I am not a hunter. I do not even own a gun. I am not here to represent or defend the NRA - because I don't believe that they are responsible for my daughter's death. Therefore, I do not believe that they need to be defended. If I believed they had anything to do with Rachel's murder, I would be their strongest opponent.

I am here today to declare that Columbine was not just a tragedy -- it was a spiritual event that should be forcing us to look at where the real blame lies! Much of the blame lies here, in this room. Much of the blame lies behind the pointing fingers of the accusers, themselves. I wrote a poem just four nights ago that expresses my feelings best.

Your laws ignore our deepest needs,

Your words are empty air;

You've stripped away our heritage,

You've outlawed simple prayer.

Now gunshots fill our classrooms,

And precious children die.

You seek for answers everywhere,

And ask the question "Why?"

You regulate restrictive laws,

Through legislative creed.

And yet you fail to understand,

That God is what we need!

"Men and women are three-part beings. We all consist of body, mind, and spirit. When we refuse to acknowledge a third part of our make-up, we create a void that allows evil, prejudice, and hatred to rush in and wreak havoc. Spiritual presences were present within our educational systems for most of our nation's history. Many of our major colleges began as theological seminaries. This is a historical fact. What has happened to us as a nation? We have refused to honor God, and in so doing, we open the doors to hatred and violence. And when something as terrible as Columbine's tragedy occurs -- politicians immediately look for a scapegoat such as the NRA. They immediately seek to pass more restrictive laws that contribute to erode away our personal and private liberties. We do not need more restrictive laws. Eric and Dylan would not have been stopped by metal detectors. No amount of gun laws can stop someone who spends months planning this type of massacre. The real villain lies within our own hearts.

As my son Craig lay under that table in the school library and saw his two friends murdered before his very eyes, he did not hesitate to pray in school. I defy any law or politician to deny him that right! I challenge every young person in America and around the world, to realize that on April 20, 1999, at Columbine High School, prayer was brought back to our schools. Do not let the many prayers offered by those students be in vain. Dare to move into the new millennium with a sacred disregard for legislation that violates your God-given right to communicate with Him. To those of you who would point your finger at the NRA -- I give to you a sincere challenge. Dare to examine your own heart before casting the first stone! My daughter's death will not be in vain! The young people of this country will not allow that to happen!" - Darrell Scott

Do what the media did not - - let the nation hear this man's speech. Please send this out to everyone you can. God Bless!
"Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil - it has no point"

Thursday, January 12, 2012

New Life Resolution Day 8: Quiet Time Reveal, The Power of the Living Word

So today is the second day that I am post juice fast.  I still feel awesome.  I am eating mostly fruits and veggies with a tad it of meat when I go out, Like Wednesday night dinner last night at Erath.  But I am avoiding junk food.  God called me to quiet time with Him this morning.  My quiet time is an everyday goal but I will be honest and admit that it far too easily falls by the way-side.
I sat down this morning with my Bible and prayed for God to reveal his will for me to me and this is what I found.  I opened to the middle of the book of Daniel and I was intrigued by the fasting vision Daniel had of a huge war with rules that sounded uncannily like our governments today.  I read 2-3 chapters and decided that I needed to start at the beginning.  What I found litterly made me call out to God and immediately call my husband.
Daniel 1:8-16

8-10 But Daniel determined that he would not defile himself by eating the king's food or drinking his wine, so he asked the head of the palace staff to exempt him from the royal diet. The head of the palace staff, by God's grace, liked Daniel, but he warned him, "I'm afraid of what my master the king will do. He is the one who assigned this diet and if he sees that you are not as healthy as the rest, he'll have my head!"

11-13 But Daniel appealed to a steward who had been assigned by the head of the palace staff to be in charge of Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah: "Try us out for ten days on a simple diet of vegetables and water. Then compare us with the young men who eat from the royal menu. Make your decision on the basis of what you see."

14-16 The steward agreed to do it and fed them vegetables and water for ten days. At the end of the ten days they looked better and more robust than all the others who had been eating from the royal menu. So the steward continued to exempt them from the royal menu of food and drink and served them only vegetables.

HOW HAVE I NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE!!!!!  God has renwed my drive for a wholesome fruit and veggetable based diet.  I choose to be like Daniel and not eat the diet of our kingly world but rather eat what God has provided for me from this earth.  Such an amazing experience when the Word of God comes alive and speaks directly into your situation.  This is why it is SO very important to physically put yourself in the Word.  Simply listening to sermons or reading books written by others is NO SUBSTITUTE for the one on one connect with God expereinced through the Bible.  Thank you God for that gift!
DOWN 1.4 lbs today!!!!

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Day 7: End of fast and Airrosti

So I ended my juice fast last night. I ate some salsa, guacamole and chips. I was having a hard time concentrating and yes I could have just pushed through but I am not my only responsibility. I have 2 precious little girls in my care and when my fog started to effect my driving I figured it was time to pull the plug. In all I lost 10 lbs in 6 days...not too bad...but weight loss was not my primary goal. Don't get me wrong, it was a great side-effect of the fast but not the greatest.

Let me tell you what!!!!!! I feel AMAZING! I woke this morning and the only thing that sounded the least bit good was pineapple and strawberries with a cup of coffee and a dab of soy milk in the coffee for creamer. Not too far of a divergence from my fast diet except for the caffeine and the fact that I actually got to chew something. The fog has lifted and I am soooo very energized. Normally with my swelling and arthritis normal, everyday tasks can be difficult for me to accomplish. I am usually lethargic, sleepy and a bit depressed. Not today!
I leapt from bed this morning got my daughter ready for school, packed her snack (an orange), made coffee and prepared my breakfast. Then I mopped the kitchen, washed a load of clothes, put up laundry, hung the girls clothes, cleaned our Rae's dresser, matched millions of tiny little socks, cleaned my tub and shower and I am still going. I think the detox was a success!!! I am so very excited!
My taste buds are definitely changed. I tried to sip on some lipton citrus green tea last night and EWWWWW!!!! It was like drinking syrup--far to sweet and sickly thick. My coffee was perfect with just a dab of soymilk--I didn't crave a thick flavored cream or any artificial sweetener. I am thinking that I will have more fruit for lunch and maybe some celery. Even a sandwich sounds super heavy for now. I need to ease my way back in to eating a full 'meal' and even that term has a new definition.
Jason and I have agreed to cut red meat and regular milk out of our diet (unless the milk is used for cooking). We are going to eat veggies (which were shocking absent in our prefast diet), fruit, whole grains, fish and chicken. I am excited.
This morning when I weighed I was up like 1.4 lbs. Didn't really bother me. I realize that that weight is the food in my digestive system...something that hasn't been there in days. With that said I don't look for a continual regain of all the lost weight. With my new diet the scale will continue to inch down at a healthy rate.
With all that said I feel that I should also talk a bit more about something else pretty awesome in m y life right now--Airrosti. I went for my second visit yesterday and it was amazing. I have struggled for at least 5 years with intense neck tightness and pain. I have been to the GP who prescribed 2 different muscle relaxers and sent me to get a MRI. The MRI showed some bulging discs and twisting in my cervical vertebrae. Upon reviewing the MRI my GP sent me to a neurosurgeon. The neurosurgeon concurred that the pain was from the bulging and twisting and asked me if I had been in a car accident. I HADN'T! I kept telling everyone that the pain started when I was breastfeeding my first child. She breastfed for a whopping 14-16 months (I cant remember the exact time). He didn't think that could be a cause, even though I was SURE of it, and he gave me a TENS unit. This was a small black box that generated electrical impulses to stimulate the muscle in order to distract me from the pain. He also recommended steroid injections right into my spinal column to reduce the swelling. Well I soon thereafter got pregnant with Raeleigh so I could no longer use the TENS unit or get the shots and it was time to breastfeed again.
While pregnant with Raeleigh I started noticing some joint pain in my elbows, wrists and OF COURSE hips. I thought it was simple joint pain form my tendons relaxing due to pregnancy hormone and I wrote it off. Something else odd started to happen. The neck pain never let up and even worsened with the renewed breastfeeding routine. I started to get extreme pain from any bump, poke or bang. These were my first signs of fibromyalgia. I am no physician but I am educated enough to see a correlation here. I will talk more about my reasoning in a minute.
So I breastfed Rae for 8 months and then had my second bout of Hashimotos thyroiditis and went to the GP. At this time my lethargy was getting out of control. I had to do something. The GP found a lump on my thyroid. My mom had thyroid cancer in her 30s so as a precaution I had a biopsy. Luckily enough the lump was not cancerous but I had no energy. My GP sent me to an endocrinologist that placed me on a small dose of synthroid...very, very small. It seemed to help but I think now it was just the placebo effect and me just WANTING to feel better. Rae weaned herself when I started the new meds.....she didn't like them at all!
So I lived like this for a while...neck hurting, body sensitive to pain, joints hurting and low energy. Then the joint pain got unbearable. My GP sent me to a rheumetologist. The Rheumy diagnosed me with psoriatic arthritis (explaining the joint pain) and fibromyalgia explaining the body tenderness. He also told me I was pre-lupus...ANA negative but enough symptoms to see the path that I was headed down. I was placed on methotrexate and over the following months I went from a small dose of 4 per week to the max dose of 10 per week. Methotrexate is low-dose chemo and kills in inflamed and damaged cells. It is lethal to a fetus. I couldn't live with the idea of unexpectedly getting pregnant and not knowing it in time and losing the baby due to the meds. Methotrexate is the same type of drug that they use for the morning after pill. So, a few months later Jason got 'fixed'. We were done with kids--I mourned. This sent me into a bit deeper depression.
In the meantime Jason's grandfather passed and his grandmother became more and more dependent on the family to provide for her. I committed to driving to see her once a week. The house and yard was in great disrepair so I began cleaning up a bit on my visits. One such visit I spent about 2 hours outside trimming bushed, shrubs and trees to clean out the overgrowth. I used some heavy duty hedge clippers and really hurt myself. The action used to chop off heavy branches seriously tweaked my neck. I was in excruciating pain. I went to the chiropractor the next day. I saw her for 5-6 visits and it helped a little but it wasn't intense enough. She used what is called the activator method and I later discovered that it is not as effective as hands on manipulation. I was so sad nothing was helping. I was always hurting. I went from ice to heat and back again several time a day. I was up to 4 aleve per day in addition to all my other caustic drugs. This was not a pattern that I could continue and it was getting worse. One thing I got from my chiro that actually helped was sleeping on a towel roll paced under what should be the curve of my is distorted so badly that it doesn't curve back at the neck to support my head like it juts forward and makes my head feel very heavy for my neck to support.
The depression then increased my neck pain and lethargy. Enough was enough. I went back to the GP about 3 years after the first MRI and the GP ordered another. I have what physicians call a buffalo hump. I have had it as long as I can remember...even back in middle school. It is larger now and consists of a hard center and tons of swelling. I could get the swelling gone with ice. MRI showed same results...good news that there wasn't any deterioration but options remained the same....cortisone shot....I was at my wits end and did it.
It was invasive, scary and expensive...but I got relief--for THREE weeks! *SCOFF* $750 for 3 weeks? I think not. So I was back at square one. Or at least I thought. Good news was on its way. Jason had attended a meeting at work about some new health benefits and one new program sounded very promising--Airrositi.
It was supposed to be able to relieve most neck and back pain in 3-5 visits and the visit copay was only $10. I could totally try this. The chiro copay had been $40 per visit and the shot...well, it was insane. So I signed up. I am so very glad I did.
This is where I will talk about how I believe all my disorders stemmed from my chronic neck pain. I was well until the neck pain began. I was a normal weight. I was active and while I have always been autoimmune disorder was under control. When the neck pain began, my sleep was disrupted and I began to snore. I began using a cpap for the snoring. But the sleep deprivation from the pain began to manifest symptoms of fibromyalgia. If you read about fibro there is always a sleep disorder associated with it and some people and researchers believe that fibro can be set off my chronic pain--the body hurts so badly for so long that it begins to misinterpret signals and everything registers as painful. The depression and pain from the neck and fibro began to take a toll on my immune system and new disorders started popping out. The lethargy from the thyroid and depression led me to self medicate with caffeine and sugar for energy and the weight piled on worsening my psoriatic arthritis and poor diet began to take its toll on my immune system. It is all related. 100% positive.
So now here I am two visits into Airrosti and things are looking up. I can fall asleep unmedicated. I am down to 2 and sometimes no aleve per day. I am not continuously in pain and my doctors says in 2-3 more visits I will not only be pain free but HEALED!!!! He said my fascia was in a mess and had contracted and balled up from hours and hours of holding something in a cradled position with both arms while my head was down and my shoulders pulled up. Sounds interestingly like the position one takes to...BREASTFEED!!! He agreed. I was right all along and no one listened. I was not in a car accident--I was a mom who breastfed for a combined 24 months (feeling sorry for Michelle Duggar's neck right about now). The treatment is oh so simple. The doctor uses his thumbs to apply extreme pressure and a slow directional force to stretch the fascia (tissue encapsulating the muscles) back to its intended length. He explained that muscles are very vascular and therefore heal fast. Fascia, however, has very little blood flow so that when it become damaged or contracted it needs help to relax. The treatment is very painful. I get nauseous and have even felt like I could pass out but afterwards the results are UNBELIEVABLE!!!
This last time he worked on both sides of my shoulders and then the attachment from my jaw down to my shoulder. It felt like he rolled the muscle/fibers from my shoulder to skull along both sides of my neck and I literally had to recite the Lords Prayer to myself in my head so that I wouldn't vomit and then pass out. But today...NO PAIN!

After the 30 minute hands on treatment you see an in-house physical therapist who doest some exercises with you and assigns homework etc. They use some 'kinetic tape' to increase blood flow and promote healing--you wear it after you appointment for up to 3 days. It is awesome.
After 5 years I have found someone who doesn't just want to give me drugs or cut me open--they actually want to heal the problem....treat the issue...I am so very EXCITED! I LOVE AIRROSTI.

So this has been and epically long post. I have tons of other things I want to touch on but I will save those for tomorrow so I don't bore whoever may read this to death!
Here's to juice fasting, vegan/vegetarian eating, juice fasting and AIRROSTI!!!

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Airriosti visit 2/Juice fast day 6

Good energy today.  Feeling good about my decision to make it a 10day fast.  Thirty days is just not feasible for me as this time.  I plan to eat healthy for 1-2 weeks and may be revisit a longer juice fast depending on how I feel.  It is doing good so far though--I just miss chewing!
I had my 2nd airriosti visit today.  OUCH!  Airiosti is a intense form of deep muscle manipulation that focuses on the fascia surrounding the muscles.  I have had severe neck pain for 5+ years.  I have bulging discs and twisted vertebra--I was told that these were the source of my pain.  WRONG!  Countless muscle relaxers, a neurosurgeon and one epidural cortisone shot later I found myself here, at Airriosti.  I am so very thankful that I ended up here.
I wont lie to you, it HURTS.  I get nauseous and have almost fainted.  I am terribly sore the day after even when I follow orders and ice, but the pain is diminishing.  I can fall asleep at night without a heating pad or some crazy construction of pillows to support my ailing neck in just the right manner.  IT IS WORKING!  No surgery....nothing invasive and I have hope.  I have hope that it will be healed!  So far I am loving airriosti!!!

Monday, January 9, 2012

Morning of day 5

So I am definitely waking and rising alot easier.  I have never been a morning person, I am actually that person who grumbles moodily until I ingest copious amount of coffee and sit unbothered for some number of minutes.  But not this morning.  Jason woke me to tell me it was time to get up and I thought, ah maaannnn, but then got up and at em with great ease.  Made our juice, had my quiet time, stripped 2 beds, tended to a sick kid all before I normally would have had a chance to drink that first cup of coffee.  I can live with this.
Yesterday evening was BAAADDDD HARD!  I wanted to eat anything and everything.  I DO NOT like KFC and even their commercial on tv was making my mouth water. I know myself and as of now I fear that I am going to have a hard time not binging when I break this fast.  But for now I will just worry myself with today. Cheers!

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Green Smoothie/juice fast Evening of day 4

Not gonna lie.  It has been a hard day.  I want to eat everything, even the mediocre corn dogs the kids had this evening.  I had juice for breakfast and lunch and then a smoothie for dinner.  I think that I am favoring the juice.  The smoothies just seem to have too much pulp for my liking.
Went to church today and crashed when I came home.  I seriously napped for 4 hours.  I am ready for the fatigue to lift.  When is it supposed to lift?  As I sat down this evening to my smoothie I told my hubby that I didnt know if I could do 30 days. 
I am not really struggling with the physical pangs of hunger but I am struggling with emotionally wanting to just EAT!  I like food.  I like to, I LOVE to eat.  I guess that is how I got to be a whopping 300 lbs.
Asking for your prayers...

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Green Smoothie and juice fast morning of day 3

It is the morning of day 3, and so far so good.  I am still in the early stages of detox.  I am tired, lethargic and I had a monsterous headache yesterday but I have n ot really been hungry.  As of this morning I do not have a headache, that is good news.  I have been combining green smoothies and juice.  I am using this method mostly to cut cost.  It takes ALOT of produce to get 12 oz of juice. 
I am juicing the less palateable veggies and then putting that juice into my smoothies.  I am also drinking some of the juices straight, like the famous MEAN GREEN juice.
Some of the things I am using are spinach, squash, eggplant, pineapple, ginger, lemon, lime, orange, apple, bananna, celery, bell pepper, blackberries, grapes, carrots, pears, etc...
Thus far 6lbs lost.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Fast begins tomorrow---surpise from hubby

So my fast begins tomorrow morning.  Jason went grocery shopping tonight to get all my fruits, veggies etc and got me a great suprise. 

We were unpacking all the goods and Jason kept acting weird.  He kept laughing at me.  I thought he was making fun of me for doing the juice fast/smoothie fast because of the Jim Carey In Living Color Skit  that he showed me the other day.

So I made a big deal about him not making fun of me.  I wanted him to tell me why he kept laughing and the he asked me where my blender I had set out on the counter had came from.  I was sooo confused.  He unplugged my blender and started to put it up.  I was freaking out.  I had no clue what he was doing and then I looked down!  All along I had been standing next too, touching and evening at times moving the box of a brand new juicer!!!!!  So he WAS making fun of me all along but not for wanting to do this fast--because I am a big fat doof!!  I love my man!

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

New Life Resolution--Green Smoothie fast preplanning

I have come across lots of information lately that has all pointed towards whole foods, raw foods and low animal based foods diet as the ideal diet for autoimmune dosorders.  I have watched things like "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead", "FoodMatters" and "Forks over Knives" among other things.
I have a fibromyalgia diagnosis, but it seems to be partially if not completely, in remission.  I have psoriasis and psoriatic arthritis.  I am considered pre-lupus---and I am only 30 years old. And as of today I am considering a visit to the doctor for a test for Cushings disease. I have been on methotrexate for 3 years, muscle relaxers for 3 years, antidepressants for 4 years, blood pressure meds for 2 years and things do not seem to be getting better.  I am going to greatly humble myself here and admit that my weight teeters at 300lbs.  Yes, you read that right.  There are alot of mitigating factors but I cannot deny that I am solely to blame, period.  I got myself in this bind and I, with God's help, will get myself out.
Here is my plan.  I am on Thursday January 5th embarking on a 30 day green smoothie fast.  For 30 days I will consume only raw fruits, vegetables, water, black coffee, green tea and small amounts of soymilk. While weightloss is a long-term goal, my most pressing goal is to feel better and eat healthier.  I am not looking at this as a diet--this is a treatment.  I am making the choice to let food be my medicine.  I am willing to try something that I have never tried before in order to achieve something that I have never achieved before.
After my 30 days of green smoothie fast I will break for a short time and actually 'eat' my meals (still maintaining a vegetarian diet).  I plan to then begin a 10 day juice fast--that is if I can persuade my husband to buy me a juicer!!!
Is this my New Years Resolution?  Not really, but maybe. I don't want to doom it by placing that moniker on it so I will call this My New Life Resolution.