Boobie Babble

I have fear. I fear lots of things. But mostly I fear for my safety and the safety of my family. These are deep rooted fears. But tonight as I did my Beth Moore Study I got to thinking about this fear I have. I want to walk every day. I have been paralysed with fear because that means taking 2 kids and myself out without Jason. That makes me feel soooo vulnerable. I know that God does not give me the spirit of fear!!! I am going to make myself do it. I realize that the fear I will pass along to my girls by fearing to do these things it far more dangerous than just going for a walk... So here goes...tomorrow is a new day.

I am so frustrated with being sick. I am so tired of being tired. I am just realy for SOMETHING to be easy... I dont even care what...just something socially, spiritually, financially, health, attitude, energy, even breastfeeding... Something has got to give soon or this 'tree' is gonna snap in two.

DISCLAIMER: This is raw truth! WOW! I had no idea that my inability to be a team player stemmed from a deep rooted prideful sin. I NEVER played a team sport. I mean,NEVER! I was on the cheerleading squad but as the mascot. I was inable to do something that required me to rely on anyone else. I do not trust. I always feel that if I want smething done right I just have to do it myself. I get angry when told what to do. I dont like someone else's idea to be chosen over my own... I am currently participating in a Beth Moore Study entitled Breaking Free and learning how to not be a captive anymore. I am a captive of my own pridefulness and didnt even realize that I was being prideful at all. I never thought pride to be one of my big weaknesses--but man was I wrong. In leadership roles I feel in control and 'know' my vision is being accomplished. I love being the leader. I have always had a very hard time being an indian to any other chief. The deal was, either I was...

I remember growing up how chores were so terribly dreaded, but what was great about childhood was that there was someone there to MAKE you do them even if you didnt want to. I find as an adult that even thought I know something is the Lords will for me and for my best or for the goodness of my friends or family, I still have a problem with chores. It amazes me how even things I love to do can somehow be manipulated by be it spiritual warfare or depression or pure laziness and in the end become chores. In June of 2005 I weighed 145. That is a great weight for me and honestly, I like to have a bit of meat on my bones and feel sexy up to about 185. Two pregnancies later and I find myself hovering at a life time high of 250. WHAT! That cant be right...but sadly it is. I WANT change. I am NOT happy. But yet that desire to be healthier and better gets distorted into a chore and I find myself munching on junk food and 'forgetting' to work out. I even make excuses to myself, ...

yeah i know i never proofread, so shoot me see the post below

What happens in Formation group, STAYS in formation group... Lose the pucker? Sonic...that is just a choice you make bellmead taco bell a little like vegas but alot more fun and the list continues... ________________________________________________________ Reese did # 2 in the potty today. I dont think I have ever been so excited to see poop IN MY LIFE! ________________________________________________________ My dog has allergies soooo badly that he wont step off the concete patio outside, man that stinks! ________________________________________________________ How hilarious would it be fore there to be male chipmunks instead of chip n dales....i would much rater see a bunch of adult men dance around in full out chipmunk suits...totally hilarious... WAIT I bet there are, i mean come on they have ice capades for everything these days, surely there is an Alvin, Simon, and Theodore out there SOMEWHERE...hmmmmm I would totally prefer a bachelorette party THERE. And PLEASE, NO STRIPPING......

We are such a wealthy nation. I had never seen this pulitzer prize winning phot obefore today and it will haunt me henceforth...

Election '08 Resources Official Candidate Websites Democrats Senator Barack Obama http://www.barackobama.com/index.php Democratic Party http://www.democrats.org/ Barack Obama met with Rick Warren at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, Calif., on Saturday, August 16. Click to watch video of Senator Barack Obama's appearance with Rick Warren. Link does not imply endorsement of candidate nor endorsement of comments made by YouTube users. Full version video. (YouTube) - August 20, 2008 Saddleback Forum On Presidency: Barack Obama Republicans Senator John McCain http://www.johnmccain.com/ Republican National Committee http://www.gop.com/ John McCain met with Rick Warren at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, Calif., on Saturday, August 16. Click to watch video of Senator John McCain's appearance with Rick Warren. Link does not imply endorsement of candidate nor endorsement of comments made by YouTube users. Part 1 - 4. (YouTube) - August 20, 2008 Saddleback Forum on Presidency: Jo...

I am by Eddie James Verse 1: I am the Lord, I’m the Almighty God I am the One for when nothing is too hard I am the Shepherd and I am the Door I am the Good news to the bound and the poor Chorus:I am, I am, I am, I am Verse 2: I am the righteous One and I am the Lamb,I am the Ram in the bush for Abraham,I am the Ultimate Sacrifice for sin,I am your Redeemer, the Beginning and the End Chorus:I am, I am, I am, I am Verse 3: I am Jehovah, and I am the King,I am Messiah, David’s Offspring,I am your High Priest, and I am the Christ,I am the Resurrection, I am the Life Chorus:I am, I am, I am, I am Verse 4: I am the Bread, and I am the Wine,I am your Future, so leave your past behind.I am the One in the midst of two or three,I am your Tabernacle, I am your Jubilee. Chorus:I am, I am, I am, I am Verse 5:I am Hope, I am Peace, I am Joy, I am Rest,Oh I am your Comfort, and Relief from your stress,I am Strength, I am Faith, I am Love, I am Power,And today I am your Freedom, this very hour. Choru...

Mark, Jason and Marshall... hehehe

Thank God for Magic Erasers!

Ok, so LJ and I were going to a movie Friday night and appetizers b4 hand. We decided to meet at the Elite Circle Grille to chit chat b4hand and snack. Well they sometimes have 1/2 price appetizers and I volunteered to call to see if this would be happening when we were planning on going. I go to their site and get their phone #. I call the number and hear "Bellmead Taco bell"...what!?!?! I just apologised and said I had the wrong #. I thought, ok...so maybe there is a typo in their website so I go to switchboard.com and look them up. Same #. But hey, maybe i entered it wrong, so I call again. "Bellmead Taco Bell" *sigh* I just han gup without saying anything. I am exasperated so I call LJ and say, everytime I call the numbers I find for this place I get Bellmead Taco Bell I dont know how to get in touch with the Elite. She looks it up in phonebook...something i had yet to think about (what a dufus) and SAME NUMBER! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR So I said well if it is a typo in...

!!!YES!!! Chicago Bears defence turns tables on Indianapolis Colts 29-13 INDIANAPOLIS — Chicago's old formula got a new look Sunday night. It still works. The Bears relied on a strong running game to control the clock, scored on a turnover and took advantage of an Indianapolis offence that was out of sync, beating the Colts 29-13 in the first regular-season game at the new Lucas Oil Stadium. "We've always been a running football team," Kyle Orton said. "Any time you can do that, control the ball, you're going to have a good game. That's how we play football." While the strategy wasn't good enough to win the Super Bowl 19 months ago against Indy, the Bears' new starters executed the game plan to perfection this time. Matt Forte, the first Chicago rookie to start at running back since Walter Payton in 1975, ran 23 times for 123 yards - 50 on a first-quarter TD run in which he broke a tackle and then outran Bob Sanders, last season's defensi...

Wow! I had listened to this before but today is the first day i ever really HEARD it. I love it and it speaks to me and my story so well.... V1 If weakness is a wound That no-one wants to speak of Then cool is just how far we have to fall And I am not immune; I only wanna be loved But I feel safe behind the firewall Can I loose my need to impress? If you want the truth- I need to confess * CHORUS I'm not alright, I'm broken inside, broken inside; And all I go through, it leads me to You It leads me to You V2 Burn away the pride Bring me to my weakness Till everything to hide behind is gone When I'm open wide With nothing left to cling to Only You are there to lead me on Cause honestly, I'm not that strong And now I'm moved, and now I'm moved, and now I'm moved (closer to you) And now I'm moved, and now I'm moved, and now I'm moved (closer to you) And now I'm moved, and now I'm moved, and now I'm moved (closer to you) And now I...

About 7 years ago I was 'carjacked'. I dont even like using that word because it so does not describe what happened. It was in October of 2001 early morning about 7:45am. I was in bellmead/lacylakeview right outside waco and was heading to my car to go to Baylor's campus for my morning classes. I had my slimfast shake in one hand, my backpack on my back and my cell phone case and keys in other hand. My memory of that day is so vivid that I can even remember what I was wearing down to the undergarments. Before I came down the apartment stairs, I saw the man turning the corner of the parking lot, walking. He had a brown bag in one hand. He was far enough away that I felt 'ok' going to my car. But there was that twinge of fear. I should have listened. I opened my car, keyless entry, threw in my backpack and cell phone case, sat down and set down my cell phone case. I was closing the door and had the strangest sensation...it didnt close, i pulled and there was resistan...

So my weakness is discipline. My life makeover tries to address this. I have now entered into accountability with Lara Jane and I have great aspirations. Goal: get up at 6am every moring and work out, have my quiet time, shower and get dressed all b4 the girls get up. Lara Jane will call me at 7:40 every morning to see if i accomplished it. This morning....hehehe. Well I exercised and had a truncated quiet time....after i got up at ....7:20. Oops. But this is really interesting, while having my time with God this is what I opened to Judges 2 Disobedience and Defeat 6 After Joshua had dismissed the Israelites, they went to take possession of the land, each to his own inheritance. 7 The people served the LORD throughout the lifetime of Joshua and of the elders who outlived him and who had seen all the great things the LORD had done for Israel. 8 Joshua son of Nun, the servant of the LORD, died at the age of a hundred and ten. 9 And they buried him in the land of his inheritance,...

Ok so remember we owe like $3500 in hospital bills from pregnancy and birth. Then add GIGANTIC amounts of credit card and student loan debt and now...are you sitting down? My friggin AC is blown. We had water in house from unit and I really thought iw as just a loose connection and had a really good attitude and now, *SCREAMING* $2500 fix. Someone shoot me. THank GOD for Sherri. But just another person I owe. :(

It is so nice to be a part of a community that reaches out. Just from a small blog post I have received so much encouragement and support and care. I thank God for the blessing of these relationships and I am excited to nourish them and see them grow. I love you all.